Sunday, January 31, 2010

Day 8: Xavier is still sick

I am getting really worried now. Xavier has not been eating well for more than a week and continues to vomit at least every other feed. He is sleeping A LOT but waking frequently from what appears to be stomach pains. It is extremely hard to see him like this. We have another appointment with the pediatrician and hopefully we can get to the bottom of this.
And not only am I sick with worry for Xavier, I feel terribly guilty and bad for Mackenzie who has had a lot less of mom and dad's attention these days.
And today she started crawling! Although they are twins, these two are on complete opposite spectrums right now. It is difficult to see one thriving and the other falling behind.
But I am so excited and so proud of Mack. It is just adorable to watch her pull herself across the floor (it is a sloppy crawl, but she is still learning).
As exhausting as it will be, I can't wait to see both Mack and X crawling around our house.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Caring for a sick baby

There is nothing worse (at least I have found so far) than knowing your baby is sick, but not knowing with what. Not only have I had to watch my poor little boy violently vomit over and over again, but I had to watch as nurses took blood from his tiny little arms yesterday. The first time they did it (yes they had to do it twice, poking both arms the first time) I stood out of view, but could still hear Xavier screaming. It was a gut-wrenching feeling, one that broke my heart. When they came back for more blood I had to stay and try my best to console my sick boy.
I almost started crying as I sang twinkle twinkle little star to him while they poked his now bruised arm for blood.
Over the past week, Xavier has not been eating well, throwing up and been lethargic. He has lost a pound (was 18lbs9oz not 17lbs12oz) and lost all interest in play. He and his sister are turning eight months soon and Xavier acts nowhere near this age. I fear his one and off again sickness since November is holding him back.
After several hours in the emergency department, our pediatrician relieved some of our worries. His blood work, specifically the white/red blood cell counts were normal as well as his sodium. If these had been skewed, we could have been looking at some pretty serious diseases.
While there are still many unaswered questions, and Xavier is still sick, we are somewhat releived.
The doctor is now looking at whether or not he has Norwalk virus -- something we would just have to wait out. However, he is already four days into it and still not improving.
Hopefully my next entry will be more positive!
Please send your prayers to my little man.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Building vocabulary

Mackenzie said her first words today!! As much as I would have liked her to say mama, she said dada and baba. It was so clear considering up to this point she would only make funny noises with the spit in her mouth.
I am so proud of my little girl. It's funny how these "small" accomplishments are so exciting when you are a parent hearing it for the first time.
Unfortunately, Xavier has not been well and is still working on his vocabulary behind cries and squeals of enjoyment.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Getting the news!

(First ultrasound at 5.5 weeks pregnant)

After nearly 14 months of trying to get pregnant, Mark and I were elated to get the news from my doctor that I was pregnant.

Two home pregnancy tests had been positive, but we weren’t about to set ourselves up for another disappointment. We learned early that peeing on a stick was not always accurate.

I was at work, on my way to an assignment when I called my doctor for the results. I shook in anticipation. Not only was I pregnant, but my test results showed extremely high levels of the pregnancy hormone HGC —an early indication it could be multiples.

Another test was in order. Again, my levels were high.

I then went for an ultrasound to yet again confirm the pregnancy. I had told my husband not to come; it was too early to see anything anyways — or so I thought. While twins were a possibility, I didn’t actually believe it would happen to us.

The conversation with the ultrasound tech went like this:

Me: “So can you see anything yet?”

Tech: “Yes, I can see the two sacs.”

It took a second to register. I didn’t know much about pregnancy, but I didn’t think there was supposed to be two amniotic sacs for one baby.

Me: “Two sacs?”

Doc: “Yes. Do you have twins in your family?”

Then it hit me… I had two babies inside me!

The doctor had said this assuming I already knew it was twins. I assured him I was oblivious.

I fell silent as he finished the ultrasound. Inside, I was screaming.

How was I going to do this? For the longest time I didn’t even want children and then had decided I would be missing out on something if I didn’t at least have one.

Then I got to tell Mark. He had wanted twins all along. Must be a guy thing cause I know a few other disillusioned men who think this way. These men obviously don’t know how much work one baby is let alone TWO!

Anyways, I couldn’t reach Mark. He was supposed to have his cell phone on so I could give him the confirmation whenever I got it. I was getting frustrated. Here I had this incredibly scary news to tell him and I couldn’t get a hold of him. I knew I had to tell him first or he would be mad, but I thought about calling my mom.

When I finally got him on the phone, I was back at work sitting at the courthouse waiting for a verdict in a trial I was covering.

“You got what you wanted…” I told him.

He didn’t understand so I spelled it out — WE ARE HAVING TWINS!

He was speechless.

That night we both didn’t sleep well.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Telling the world

***This was the last column I wrote for the Sentinel-Review before taking my leave of absence.

Published Friday, March 20, 2009

I have been jolted with a Taser, tackled by a police dog, and survived a week of OPP boot camp.

I've experienced weightlessness on Xtreme Skyflyer at Canada's Wonderland and escaped suffocation after locking myself in a trunk (not the smartest thing I've ever done).

I have managed to keep two cats alive (with my husband's help) and an aloe plant that just won't die no matter how much or little I water it.

I have loved and been heartbroken.

None of that will compare -- so I am told -- to what I will experience three months from now.

I am about to become a mother of twins.

There's nothing I fear more than this, while at the same time there's nothing that excites me more.

In a short time I will have two bundles of joy, a boy and a girl, to shower with love. It's funny how already they mean so much to me and I haven't even met them yet.

March 5 was my last day at the Sentinel-Review before leaping into this unfamiliar realm called parenthood.

Leaving one life behind and picking up another in a moment's time -- two moments in my case -- is overwhelming to think about.

Or maybe it's just the hormones: my husband's explanation for all my moods these days. I am never "really" mad at him because he actually did something wrong; it's just my raging hormones talking.

Aside from the normal aches and pains, fatigue and nausea, my pregnancy has been a positive experience.

However, I am sometimes jealous that my baby bump gets more attention than me these days.

I am no longer Carla Garrett; I have become the "pregnant girl."

But I am adjusting to this new me.

What was once the screech of a siren that would have me jumping out of my seat will soon be the scream of two hungry babies.

To my surprise as I packed up my belongings from my desk -- a stuffed moose and target from the OCPS citizens' police academy, a John Deere model tractor from Leaping Deere Legends and a mini blue stress ball from Oxford EMS, along with countless photos of random people and things I came across in my work that made me smile -- I didn't feel as sad as I thought I might.

Instead, I also came across items that reminded me of the adventure ahead -- a sticky note with my due date (in case I ever forgot), a pen from my pre-natal classes and the pile of snacks I had stored in my desk for those ravenous cravings.

While I don't think I will ever be prepared for what's to come, I am definitely ready to take this next step in my life.

Wish me luck.

Welcome to my Blog

On May 31, 2009 my husband Mark and I welcomed two beautiful babies, Xavier and Mackenzie, into our lives.

Now, exactly eight months later, the fog is just starting to clear.

I would have started this blog months ago, but the demands of two darling babies have occupied much of my time. As we have now settled into a relatively predictably routine, I make this pledge to myself, my children and to my future followers:

I, Carla Garrett, will make my best effort to update this blog at least weekly, at most daily.

I will not use this blog to bore you with mindless ramblings about life, but to document the lives of Mackenzie and Xavier.

I hope to give readers a glimpse into what it’s like raising twins and to offer support and share my experiences with other moms of multiples.

And I hope someday Mack and X-Man will get a kick out of reading it!

Please understand it is still under construction and I will be playing catch up as I add posts that should have been added months ago.